Every time I look in the sky I think of Grandpa.
Every time I look at the sunset I think of great grandma.
Every time a plane flies by I think about all i’ve lost in my life.
There must be something the way that the colors blend in my teary eyes.
I was driving by Grandma’s place the other day in my tractor at work. I had my hand on the radio and I was about to tell the guy behind me to honk at Grandma. Just as the words were getting out I realize that Grandma wasn’t there anymore. I realized that I wasn’t able to go stop and talk to Grandma the way I usually would’ve. All the times we had conversations about things that I can’t even remember anymore.
As a kid I thought she would live forever. She was the kind of woman that I wanna be. She was ready for any day at any moment. 130+ grand and great grand children later she was a fighter.
One of my very last rememberable conversations with her was about changing the world. I’d stop by with daddy to tell her hello and I was in my work clothes. Dad apologized profoundly for how dirty we both looked. she looked me in the eyes and said Jenna Helen, you’re the kind of woman thats gonna change the world. Don’t apologize.
I guess my point in this is…
I’m looking you in the eye right now and telling you that you’re the one that’s going to change the world. Not because of what you can do, but because of what God has put inside of you.
Go tell your grandma you love her. Before her home is in heaven.
Go sat the crazy unexpected thing. Before you lose your voice.
And. Don’t. Ever. Apologize. For. Who. You. Are.